Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
