I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize