I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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