I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
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