You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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