I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
