I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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