Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
