I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
