she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize