I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
