you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize