To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Randomize
