seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
