Kiss
Puke
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
In America we eat man semen.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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