if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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