please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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