it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
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