So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize