It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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