Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
