Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
