Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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