it wasn't lemon gatorade
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
