We need to rekindle our bromance
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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