I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize