Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
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