Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
