he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
