plz talk dirty to me
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
