you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
