She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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