I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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