That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
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