Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Randomize
