someone get that fucking seahorse.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
