I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
