Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
