my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
