Swine flu. Run for my life!
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
