Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
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