I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
