yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Say something about gay babies.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
‪He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life‬
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
