Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
