R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Randomize
