I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
