I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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