I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
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Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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