i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I just found puke in my bra..
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize