He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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