i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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