didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
